Review Yo So Big, and more Humour

Albertaman

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Should be posting this in Edmonton forum as there is an active community of hobbyists there, but since the first note came up in a massage session in Calgary, here goes:

What are some of your funniest moments in this hobby?

So here I was in a recent semi-legit massage situation. Third time with the Asian therapist. Good therapeutic massage the first two times, with a pleasant amount of teasing before and after the flip, and a relaxing HJ in the last 15 minutes each time. Second visit advanced to some consensual mutual touching, pleasing. On this third visit, after the flip it got hot and heavy. Her pants and panties are off, my fingers stroke her wetness. Her eyes have an inquiring look above her mask. Hear her ask: Condom? Fortunately, I had one in my jacket pocket. Get off the table and get the condom. No discussion on pricing etc. She holds my cock in her two small hands and whispers the classic line, Yo So Big. I slip the condom on. After some more finger foreplay on her, get her positioned on the edge of the table. And then insert the tip of my cock into her. She gasps. I play gently in her, only with the tip inserting a bit, withdrawing, rocking in and out. She has a happy look in her eyes, mask covering any other expressions. But it alternates with a look of pain each time I thrust the tip into her a bit deeper. Her right arm comes up, and then with her fingers she gestures a measurement, and I hear her say "Two Inches, Please".

I didn't know whether I should laugh or cry, but being a gentleman, I made the best of it. Keeping the rest of the session limited to rocking thrusts no deeper than 2" certainty prolonged the activity, and I sensed that due to her 'tight condition', anything deeper could indeed be unpleasant for her. All in all it turned out ok, and she moaned and quivered throughout. I just haven't decided if I will repeat or not. TWO INCHES Please.
To her credit, she did not ask for any specific tip, leaving that to me. Certainly one of the funniest experiences in years. And a novel one for sure.

Share your funny experiences.



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I had a similar experience with a very tight Chinese lady about two years ago, two inches deep and two inches wide was her limits. Will not repeat - took all my efforts to get the head through the gate - kinda like reverse childbirthโ€ฆ..
 
I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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Umm, more contact details if you can please!
 
I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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that's a great one. Probably somewhat of a break from giving deep massages that require a lot of effort. Long time ago, used to have a Russian therapist who used to break up a 90 minute massage into three periods, each ending with a SOG. Never asked her if she was a hockey fan.


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that's a great one. Probably somewhat of a break from giving deep massages that require a lot of effort. Long time ago, used to have a Russian therapist who used to break up a 90 minute massage into three periods, each ending with a SOG. Never asked her if she was a hockey fan.


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Gives a new meaning to โ€œpulling the goalie!โ€
 
It would be really difficult not to go past the 2 inch limit !! Must have taken a lot of concentration on your part.
I would be wanting to giver her the whole 3 inches !!! Lol.
 
It would be really difficult not to go past the 2 inch limit !! Must have taken a lot of concentration on your part.
I would be wanting to giver her the whole 3 inches !!! Lol.

It took all of my early life training as a Buddhist monk to remain within the requested space. The greatest liberation of body, mind, and soul occurs during confinement. Decided, I will visit again.


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I had a similar experience with a very tight Chinese lady about two years ago, two inches deep and two inches wide was her limits. Will not repeat - took all my efforts to get the head through the gate - kinda like reverse childbirthโ€ฆ..

A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :โ€ oh - youโ€™re so big!โ€œ
โ€˜โ€œi never do this before โ€œ.
โ€œyou are too big - just go in a littleโ€.
โ€œOh baby, you making me come โ€œ.
โ€œ i only do this for you โ€œ
โ€this is the first time i do this !โ€
etc.
 
A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :โ€ oh - youโ€™re so big!โ€œ
โ€˜โ€œi never do this before โ€œ.
โ€œyou are too big - just go in a littleโ€.
โ€œOh baby, you making me come โ€œ.
โ€œ i only do this for you โ€œ
โ€this is the first time i do this !โ€
etc.

The familiar lines are exactly that. Part of the act. You missed... You So Thick

But don't forget, we are all getting older. Hormonal shifts. Greater challenges for some ladies. Best to be respectful.


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100% agree with get getting older and respect comment, starting to take all night to do what I used to be able to do all night.
 
A lot of Chinese massage girls are great actresses. Great lines like :โ€ oh - youโ€™re so big!โ€œ
โ€˜โ€œi never do this before โ€œ.
โ€œyou are too big - just go in a littleโ€.
โ€œOh baby, you making me come โ€œ.
โ€œ i only do this for you โ€œ
โ€this is the first time i do this !โ€
etc.

They BEST part is , Most guys believe them :lol
 
They BEST part is , Most guys believe them :lol

Let's face the facts. The illusion is part of the experience. Focused attention, and temporary suspension of reality. The mini vacation. False is real, Real is false. If it were to be just about massage, most people would invest in a high end massage chair, and be done with it. And also, if you happened to turn into a fly, and remained in the room with your favourite semi-legit therapist for an entire 12 hour work day, I bet you would never be seeing her again. We all repeat because we buy into some of the lies, the illusion. Fake is Real. Real is Fake. The Real, Real is pretty Ugly.


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I donโ€™t have any FS experiences as I donโ€™t partake. I have had one woman talk about the โ€œbabyโ€ when giving a HJ. Kinda strange dirty talk that didnโ€™t do much for me. Lol And another woman say I was superman while cleaning up due to the volume. I told her that there was more than what came out. She kept going on me and I showed her a second release about 3 minutes later. The next time I went to see her she asked how super โ€œsupermanโ€ was that day, so I showed her that I could go 4 times in an hour, no massage, just HJ for an hour. Funny thing was, she only wanted the regular fee and standard tip. That reminds me, I should go see her again soon. Lol


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Can we get contact info for the lady that did 4 times?
 
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    ARIA WELLNESS โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธADDRESS: 360 HWY 7, UNIT #6, RICHMOND HILLโ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ,647-222-5683 (PHONES CALL ONLY, NO TEXT'N AVAILABLE) โ™ฅ๏ธTODAY'S Schedule!โ™ฅ๏ธ Loaded lineup with Young Beautiful Girls : New Girl Helen, Sexy Girl Cici, Magical Mia and Work out๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿšด๐Ÿ’ช Babe Amy! BUY 10 HOURS (GET 11 HOURS) **TODAY'S PICK OF THE DAY ARE๐Ÿฌ๐ŸญHelen or Cici๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿญ
  34. EMSpa_schedule:
    Tomorrow's sneak peek: On Monday May 5, 2025, our attendants will be Sandy ๐Ÿ˜, Vicky ๐Ÿ˜, Sophie ๐Ÿฅฐ, Ivy ๐Ÿ˜˜ and Mia ๐Ÿค—. Call us at โ˜Ž๏ธ(905) 479-6668โ˜Ž๏ธ to book!
  35. wilson holistic centre:
    new girl Tina works at ๐Ÿ’‹535 Evans Ave today ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-531-6969โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ
  36. Lulu1980:
    Phoenix Blossom Spa ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน2 girls ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ๐Ÿ”ฅ5124 Dundas St W Etobicokeโ˜Ž๏ธ416-817-3366๐Ÿ‘ Table Shower Sea Salt Bath Body Scrub๐Ÿ˜˜ Japanese girl Nina โค๏ธ Natural Big Boobs 38 DD ๐Ÿ˜˜Pink Mini Nipples Hot body slide, super enjoyable๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜ very provocative service๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜๐Ÿ˜˜, professional super Luna deep tissue massage, has therapeutic effect to loosen bones and relieve muscle pressure and will bring you unexpected service effects, she will bring you a little surprise๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜โค๏ธYou are welcome to make an appoint
  37. SL East Spa:
    ๐Ÿ’†โ€โ™€๐Ÿ’–Sexy Sunday ๐Ÿ’œ๐Ÿ’– Ultimate destination for Asian massages๐ŸŽ‰ Two fab spots: SL Richmond Hill & SL West Oakvilleโœจ Your passport to paradise with 9 enchanting girls fr China, HK, Japan โ€” Yui, Eva, Yoyo, Jenny, Julia, 34D Cici, Julie, Tiffany & Cocoโ€” ๐ŸŽ๐Ÿ Ring us ๐Ÿ“ž647-695-6354 or text us ๐Ÿ“ฑ647-578-8169โœจ 160 East Beaver Cr., Unit 12, RichmondHill ๐Ÿ’ฐWhere Eastern charm meets Western comfort - your bliss awaits๐Ÿ™Œ
  38. EMSpa_schedule:
    ๐ŸŽ‰Time to visit!๐ŸŽ‰ Today (Sunday), our amazing attendants are Ada ๐Ÿคฉ, Lucy ๐Ÿคฉ, Christina โ€๐Ÿ‘, Ivy ๐Ÿ˜ and Cici ๐Ÿ˜˜. Call us at โ˜Ž๏ธ (905) 479-6668 โ˜Ž๏ธ to book your favourite and head on over to 7665 Kennedy Road, Unit 4, Markham!
  39. Nu spring spa888:
    ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒนsexy hot Singapore ๐Ÿ’–Filipino ๐Ÿ’– Korean girls ๐Ÿ‘working at Nu spring spa๐Ÿ’‹๐Ÿ’‹โ˜Ž๏ธ416-669-8508๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน
  40. wonderspa:
    wonderspa: ๐ŸŒบwelcome to wonder spaโ˜Ž๏ธ416-5000-800,L6a4H8๏ผŒwe have 4young beautiful girls working everyday,Happy Sunday,ensuit shower available ๐Ÿ…, friendly nice girl Sunny providing deep tissue to relax oil message back walking hot stone and nice body slide,๐Ÿ…big big boob sexy face Joey is very good looking,open maid,amazing full body massage,really popular,give you warm comfortable time๐Ÿ”ฅ
  41. DareDevil:
    ARIA WELLNESS โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธADDRESS: 360 HWY 7, UNIT #6, RICHMOND HILL,647-222-5683 โ™ฅ๏ธโ™ฅ๏ธ(PHONES CALL ONLY, NO TEXT'N AVAILABLE) โ™ฅ๏ธTODAY'S Schedule!โ™ฅ๏ธ Loaded lineup with Beautiful Girls : New Pretty Girl Cici, New Sexy Girl Faye, Magical Mia and Work out๐Ÿ‹๐Ÿšด๐Ÿ’ช Babe Amy! BUY 10 HOURS (GET 11 HOURS) ๐ŸŒน๐ŸŒน**TODAY'S PICK OF THE DAY IS ๐Ÿญ๐ŸฌCICI๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿญ**
  42. HolidaySpa:
    Sunday at ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…๐“—๐“ธ๐“ต๐“ฒ๐“ญ๐“ช๐”‚ ๐“ข๐“น๐“ช๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด3517 Kennedy Rd, Unit 4, Scarborough โ˜Ž๏ธ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿฏ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿณ-๐Ÿญ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿต๐Ÿตโ˜Ž๏ธ: Amy & Fiona. AMY is an attractive young lady with larger breasts and a nice bottom. She has outstanding oral skills, and is very popular. Donโ€™t miss out on her special skills! FIONA is a slim hottie with long dark hair, great melons and ass, and nice services. ๐ŸŒด๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒ…HOLIDAY SPA๐ŸŒ…๐Ÿ˜Ž๐ŸŒด 3517 Kennedy
  43. AliceSpa:
    SUNDAY at ๐—”๐—Ÿ๐—œ๐—–๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”, 4915 Steeles Ave. E, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿฎ๐Ÿต๐Ÿด-๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿด๐Ÿต๐Ÿด. Alice spa has 3 beauties to choose from today. Open 10am to 9pm: Super SPINNER SUMMER: is a super petite student, very small and slim, 5โ€™3โ€ & super spinner 90 pounds, All Natural 33B Cups & 33โ€ Spinner Hips, very young looking with her pretty baby face. Great at bbbj dfk cim rim cof. Excellent service and Spinner Bod!
  44. Moneylee:
    All season wellness center : Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Sophia,Young girl big breasted beautiful buttocks charming temperament Lala,Young girl big boobs beautiful face deep massage Midi , Young beautiful face sexy body and good deep massage Maggie , Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Sherry,๐Ÿ  address: #5-30 Rambler dr Brampton ,Ontario L6W 1E2โ˜Ž๏ธ4376655510
  45. wilson holistic centre:
    new girl works at ๐Ÿ’‹535 Evans Ave today ๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•๐Ÿ’•โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ416-531-6969โ˜Ž๏ธโ˜Ž๏ธ
  46. Moneylee:
    Full season wellness center: young girl pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage Anika , Student pretty face nice figure Thai deep massage salon ,Young girl Big breasted saucy naughty Ella, Taiwan girl DD Boobs Thai deep massage lily,Enchanting sexy petite deep massage Mary. 2560 Shepard ave Mississauga unit 1 .โ˜Ž๏ธ4379857899๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿˆต๏ธ๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿ‘„๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿฆต๐Ÿ‘…๐Ÿ‘…
  47. Soul Relax Spa:
    โœจ Looking for a relaxing escape? โœ… Click Here Meet๐ŸŒธValentina๐ŸŒธHellen๐ŸŒธNinaCall us today for the best treatment and service experience. Click on our Username and FOLLOW US for updates ! Call now โ˜Ž 289 - 298 - 5662โ˜Ž๏ธ Your ultimate relaxation awaits! โœจ
  48. bnwellness_wilson:
    We have 4 young girls are working today, young pretty Lily 25โ€™s with curve body and sexy Coco and sweet GFE Ella are providing deep tissue massage, pls call 4163985777 book appointment and walk in always welcome,back entrance and parking available, 350 Wilson Ave North York
  49. ForeverWarden:
    Sunday at ๐Ÿซฆโค๏ธ๐Ÿ”ด๐ŸŸฅโ™พ๏ธ๐“•๐“ž๐“ก๐“”๐“ฅ๐“”๐“ก ๐“ข๐“Ÿ๐“โ™พ๏ธ๐ŸŸฅ๐Ÿ”ดโค๏ธ๐Ÿซฆ2190 Warden Ave, Unit 201, Scarborough ๐Ÿฐ๐Ÿญ๐Ÿฒ-๐Ÿด๐Ÿฌ๐Ÿฌ-๐Ÿณ๐Ÿด๐Ÿด๐Ÿณ: Jennifer, Sophia & Cindy. Jennifer is a tall, slim & pretty Asian babe with natural melons and eraser nipples. She is very open minded. Come and give her a try, and youโ€™ll be sure to come back for more. Sophia is a sweet & pretty Chinese lady with natural B Cups and an awe-inspiring smooth rounded ass.
  50. SugarLoveSpa:
    Sunday at โค๏ธ๐Ÿ’™ ๐Ÿ’œโŽ๐—ฆ๐—จ๐—š๐—”๐—ฅ ๐—Ÿ๐—ข๐—ฉ๐—˜ ๐—ฆ๐—ฃ๐—”โŽ ๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ’—๐Ÿ’˜: ANA, CHRISTINA & JENNY. 1270 Finch Ave W (at Keele St), Unit 18. North York. ANA is a young, short and sweet lady, 5โ€™1 & 105 Lbs, very tight, with a small to medium booty. Ana is a versatile honey who provides great massage, & can accommodate your needs. CHRISTINA is Spanish, C Cups, 5'3", tall & nice curves, very open minded.
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